If there's one thing I have learned in life, it is to relax. Ever since I was a child, I have struggled with anxiety. Between 4 and 8 years old, I went through a phase of being sneaky and lying to my parents. My conscience would kill me and after I got over the phase, I was extra careful to never do it again. I watched everything I did, thought and said so carefully that I was consumed by the fear of doing something "bad".
At age ten I was talking with my parents and our pastor about it. My pastor told me over and over "Don't worry, don't worry, don't worry." It was such a relief to just be told that none of it mattered. Really? I don't have to worry? Slowly I got more and more free. There were times I thought I could fly because my mind wasn't all wrapped up in whether I was behaving. I was living my life and enjoying it.
Every now and then for years afterwards, I would fall back into the anxiety and worry. Just thinking about the awful feelings could bring on an anxiety attack (which for me was muscular spasm and feeling like I had forgotten how to breath).
This is how I got out of it: I observed myself when I was feeling good and relaxed and realized that there was a definite pattern of breathing that my body took on. I could apply that later to stop an anxiety attack. Thinking good thoughts helped too.
Once I heard a story about some commander or general in war times whose secret to success in battle was to relax by doing breathing exercises.
I believe that the bottom line of success in business, in emergencies and in everyday life is to relax. You've heard the phrase "keep calm and carry on". Well, when dealing with people some of us get anxious about what they're thinking but the truth is, if we don't worry and just do what we think is best, everything will turn out okay.
In massage this is a main theme of mine. I received a massage from someone who told me
"I do (therapeutic) massage, not relaxing massage." Her massage was definitely not very relaxing. It was very quickly executed - not too pleasant.
I do therapeutic massage and to me, going slowly is key whether you're doing light or deep work. Number one: you can't alter the soft tissues of the body by speed-skiing over them. Number two: you aren't going to help a body at all if it is not relaxed and compliant. People trust you more if you go slowly. It gives them time to request changes to your technique. It opens the door to communication. It helps them feel more in control. Always let the client be in control (within reason).
We're all too stressed these days. Stress is the antagonist of life and can cause quick health decline. We all need to relax more and massage is a great way to do that. I am so glad to do something that helps the world relax.
